This week, I’ve been thinking about parenting and technology. I’ve spent the past couple of weeks with my kids, as it’s half-term here in the UK, and it’s definitely been challenging.
Balancing work and family life at home has once again opened my eyes. Growing up, we were constantly warned that technology would ruin our minds. It might make us lazy. Perhaps this was out of fear that we would become overly reliant on it. But I’m learning that fear-mongering isn’t helpful at all, particularly when it comes to children and technology.
The real struggle for me is balancing my kids’ interaction with technology. I am also trying to understand what it means to be a child these days. While I grew up during the evolution of technology, my kids are experiencing the full digital age. The video games we had were amazing at the time with their pixel graphics. Now, my kids have games with lifelike CGI. Mobile gadgets give them instant access to countless digital games by simply downloading an app.
Many children have even created successful YouTube channels where they record themselves gaming. Meanwhile, we had to wait until we got home to play games like Sonic and Mario. I’m glad to see these games turned into films now. It’s allowed me to bond with my children in a new way.
But to return to my original question, how do we balance letting children interact with technology? How do we encourage them to play outside, whether that’s in the backyard or at the park? How do we manage to switch off the TV? How can we encourage them to play with toys? This is especially challenging when I’m on my laptop writing a blog post, then telling them that I am working.
I remember something my sister told me years ago: “You can’t stop them from interacting with technology any more than you can stop them from falling down when they play.” Now, I’m beginning to truly understand what she meant. Even if I restrict access to tablets or TV at home, they’ll inevitably encounter these things elsewhere. This could happen at a friend’s house, in shops, museums, or even at school. Instead, I’m slowly learning to guide them towards safe and beneficial interactions with digital devices.
Of course, tantrums still happen, and I’m not claiming my approach is perfect. I am fully aware of their mental health. And because of this, I am working to find the balance. But I’m discovering ways technology can streamline learning for my children. Educational apps, for example, have significantly improved my daughter’s confidence in reading and maths. I tried to help her using the traditional method. This approach frustrated both of us because I couldn’t grasp the ‘new methods’ of teaching. I was educated by Irish Catholic nuns who took an “old-school, my way or the highway” approach. But the ways my kids learn basic English and Mathematics now are completely different.
To my point: I’ve learned to harness technology to enhance my children’s learning. Alongside digital tools, we spend time drawing and dancing together—activities I genuinely enjoy. I understand not everyone has ample time. This is especially true if you are working full-time. However, I encourage you to carve out even five or ten minutes daily. Mornings work best for focused activities, while dancing in the evenings helps me stay fit too.
And if you don’t have kids, I encourage you to find your own balance between life and technology. I know how easy it can be to start to neglect your own-self. In the past before I had kids, I played games online for hours on end. Then, I struggled to wake up to go to work the next morning. Even now, with kids, I sometimes find myself bingeing on a show until 1 am – if I manage to stay up. The struggle is real.
My kids are young – under the age of 10. Watching the Netflix TV show Adolescence also made me now start to plan my next steps for the future.
But in all honesty, we are all trying to find the balance. And no matter what, remember, technology is here to stay. We now need to adapt to it in a safe way.
