I want to talk about a night of faith and dreams. There’s something profoundly human about waking up in the middle of the night. It is a time filled with questions about life, faith, and fear. They also concern who we are in the face of it all. Omuntu – The Art of Being Human was not designed to provide perfect answers. Instead, it holds space for the messy beauty of spiritual growth. It also cherishes emotional honesty. Today’s post is a personal reflection on a strange and sacred night. On that night, fear tried to take root, but faith fought back.
The First Awakening: A Presence in the Dark – Faith
I pray the Lord’s Prayer every day. It is not just in routine but in rhythm with my breath. I do it whenever I can. It’s become an anchor. One night this week, I woke up to what felt like a spiritual disturbance. I heard strange sounds as though something was trying to enter into my safe space.
Normally, I freeze up in those moments. Fear paralyses me — literally. Sleep paralysis, from what I have read.
But this time was different. I began to pray. I began to sing (You are worthy to be praised*). Imagining the Holy Spirit like a light expanding from within me, pushing back the darkness. I could see it, picture it and it made me feel amazing. It felt… illuminating. Euphoric. Like a freedom that I have never felt before.
And then I drifted back to sleep, full of peace and joy.
The Second Awakening: The Dream of Invasion – Fear
When I awoke again a couple of hours later, everything had changed. I had dreamt of an apocalyptic world where smart, strategic zombies were wiping out humanity. It wasn’t just horror — it was infiltration. They wanted a specific person. And they travelled in herds from settlement to settlement, trying to find that specific person. The irony of this, is that I normally have these dreams after watching a similar movie or show before bed. And then it’s normally my brain processing.
But this felt different. It felt certain. With that, I turned from watcher to becoming the specific person. The human they sought. And without hesitation, I threw myself into a tree shredder so they couldn’t claim my brain. They didn’t feel the need to keep me alive if I refused to join them. And I was determined not to be turned into a zombie. Determined not to be a part of the downfall of human beings.
Just before I died in the dream, the zombie leader whispered, “What a waste.”
And it was then that I woke up… into paralysis.
The Struggle for My Voice – Freedom
I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. The euphoria I’d felt earlier was gone. This felt like the darkness returning — mocking me, telling me the light was temporary. But something in me refused to let go. I normally try to go back to sleep and back to the dream. But this time, I somehow felt that that was not the right thing to do. Because I was not in control. Something else was in control.
I began to repeat the Lord’s Prayer in my mind. I aimed to say it twelve times. And trusted that by the time I get to the 10th time, I will able to speak. Another difference to how I feel normally was that, this time, I wasn’t scared. Because I was scared many nights that I have woken up from a nightmare.
With each repetition, I clawed my way back to the light from before. And by the twelfth time, I began to move. I could speak. And I felt free again.
What Does It All Mean?
I haven’t a clue. But here’s what I’m learning:
- Fear is loud, but faith is steady.
- Darkness tries to convince you it’s inevitable, but light always pushes through.
- Our spiritual lives aren’t meant to be easy — they’re meant to be real and connect us to our salvation.
- Prayer isn’t magic — it’s movement. It shifts something deep within, even when nothing around you seems to change.
- Do not hesitate to ask questions. Do not be afraid to question things that do not make sense to you.
- And most importantly: you don’t need to understand it all to believe. You just need to keep going and continue to pray that you will soon understand. Continue to read the Bible and the Scriptures to build on your knowledge.
The Art of Being Human
Maybe the art of being human isn’t just about how we live in the light. It’s about how we respond in the dark. It’s about how we continue to fight the darkness within all of us.
If this post resonates with you, I hope it reminds you of something important. That even in the strangest of moments, you are never alone. These can be times when your body won’t move or when your mind is battling dread.
So keep praying. Keep breathing. Keep believing.
And when you rise again, may you rise with clarity, with freedom, and with peace. The Lord’s Prayer from the New Testament – Matthew 6.9–13 and Luke 11.1–4
Church of England website.
